'enga annan paasakaara paiyanaayittan mama' exulted ammu when I went to Coimbatore recently. she was clearly excited following the acknolwedgement from her brother. I felt happy for the girl who gave me sleepless nights when she wrote me that she wanted to commit suicide because of her family's indifference to her. She is a perfect case study for the 'rise of a rebel'. She is a sweet and simple girl, whose simplicity was miconstrued and ridiculed as 'insanely innocent', looked out longer for acknowlegement and recognition, Atlast she stopped looking out and started holding her feelings with herself, much rebelling in the exterior. No the subject of this article is not her, but the sudden 'U' turn in the relationship between the siblings.
I consider my sister as a confidant than a conventional sister. We didn't have that 'typical' filmy "anna - thangachi" childhood. In my +2, lot of my classmates' sisters were her friends, so whatever 'mischiefs' I do in my school, whenever I bunked the class, the news first reached her, then to my parents thus giving me tough evenings, nights etc.. She was my enemy No. 1. I went to outstation college first, there was as a sort of mellowing down things between us. Then she went to Karaikudi, the days we meet were reduced to few weeks per year. We had lot of communication through letters, where I used to tell a lot about whats happening from my side.. When we meet it was like two long lost friends having a good time. Ofcourse there used to be fights for TV remotes. Other than that not much reasons for fights...
Now the similiar things are happening between my cousins ammu and buttan. Suddenly ammu is still finding hard to believe whether what's happening to her is true or not. Ofcourse my nieces Indhu and her bete-noire Madhu will soon come into terms as already Indhu had moved to college. Infact they used to fight with an attitude that only one must survive. Is this a general phenomenon? If so do 'distance' play a major role in the mellow down of relationships?
To substantiate my theory I just want to quote Lissy Priyadarshan's interview which I watched some times back. She said that her husband used to stay outdoors for 2-3 months at a stretch and come home once in a while for a week or two. They don't have much differences as he leaves again just before the problems crop up. Very much joking 'Our marriage works because we don't see enough of us each other', Lissy set the ball rolling.
In 'Kofee with Anu', Surya confessed that he missed his brother Karthik when the latter went to US for higher studies even though he bullied and terrorised young Karthik. Of course it was so nice of Surya to 'confess' in before millions of people. Even though the simplified theory is the break makes us remember only good things about the other person, thats why the distant relationships work better, I just am curious about whether this is the case of everybody who has a sibling.
Ofcourse there are exceptions in my circle itself. My cousins Prakash and his sister Brindha were (are) typical 'Paasamalar' - Annaaaa - thangacheeee sort of ever since young age. Also some cases are there where there is no reconcilation even after the protagonists becoming adults.
Is distance the only factor is mellow down of sibling relationships? Or has age and wisdom something to do with this? Else do the arrival of romantic intrests also responsible for looking a 'complete family picture'. What could be the possible reasons for the fighting in young age?
The elder kid sees the young one with a jealousy as it loses sizeable amount of attention it used to get from parents, after the younger one arrives. Sometimes the young ones doesn't listen to elder ones, thus the ego of the latter is hurt, making it to see the young ones with hatred and contemption. The younger ones bully the elder ones because they are being pampered. Once they grow up, they realise that it is a general phenomenon, so the enimity between them vanishes in due course.
Whatever could be the reason, I always used to tell my acquintances who complain about their kids' rivalry, not to worry as things will change once they go to college hostel.
Now the similiar things are happening between my cousins ammu and buttan. Suddenly ammu is still finding hard to believe whether what's happening to her is true or not. Ofcourse my nieces Indhu and her bete-noire Madhu will soon come into terms as already Indhu had moved to college. Infact they used to fight with an attitude that only one must survive. Is this a general phenomenon? If so do 'distance' play a major role in the mellow down of relationships?
To substantiate my theory I just want to quote Lissy Priyadarshan's interview which I watched some times back. She said that her husband used to stay outdoors for 2-3 months at a stretch and come home once in a while for a week or two. They don't have much differences as he leaves again just before the problems crop up. Very much joking 'Our marriage works because we don't see enough of us each other', Lissy set the ball rolling.
In 'Kofee with Anu', Surya confessed that he missed his brother Karthik when the latter went to US for higher studies even though he bullied and terrorised young Karthik. Of course it was so nice of Surya to 'confess' in before millions of people. Even though the simplified theory is the break makes us remember only good things about the other person, thats why the distant relationships work better, I just am curious about whether this is the case of everybody who has a sibling.
Ofcourse there are exceptions in my circle itself. My cousins Prakash and his sister Brindha were (are) typical 'Paasamalar' - Annaaaa - thangacheeee sort of ever since young age. Also some cases are there where there is no reconcilation even after the protagonists becoming adults.
Is distance the only factor is mellow down of sibling relationships? Or has age and wisdom something to do with this? Else do the arrival of romantic intrests also responsible for looking a 'complete family picture'. What could be the possible reasons for the fighting in young age?
The elder kid sees the young one with a jealousy as it loses sizeable amount of attention it used to get from parents, after the younger one arrives. Sometimes the young ones doesn't listen to elder ones, thus the ego of the latter is hurt, making it to see the young ones with hatred and contemption. The younger ones bully the elder ones because they are being pampered. Once they grow up, they realise that it is a general phenomenon, so the enimity between them vanishes in due course.
Whatever could be the reason, I always used to tell my acquintances who complain about their kids' rivalry, not to worry as things will change once they go to college hostel.
